Chapter 20

The Kentucky Derby.  They were going to the Kentucky Derby.  And the Barnstable Gala.  And Richie was playing at both.  So much for him wanting to be home more.  It felt like they were running every day of the week lately.  Stephanie shook her head as she wandered through her favorite dress shop in Burbank.  She always had good luck in here.  A secret smile snuck across her face as she thought about one very memorable dusky gold dress she had found here.  She hoped she was as fortunate on this trip.  She breathed out a quiet sigh.  With the way things were between them lately, it may not make much of a difference.

She was flipping aimlessly through a rack of cocktail dresses when the owner came out from the store room.

“Miss Stephanie, so nice to see you again!”

“Hey Jeanine, it’s been a while, hasn’t it?” 

Jeanine was barely five foot tall and weighed about 90 pounds soaking wet.  But the woman had energy for days.  She could outlast the Energizer bunny given the chance.  Her hair today was as pink as the battery bunny and against the brilliant green of her blouse made Stephanie think an Easter basket exploded on her.  But, no matter, the woman knew her stuff. 

Jeanine bustled over to the rack Stephanie was going through, “where have you been hiding and what are we shopping for today my friend?”

“I haven’t been hiding, just haven’t needed a dress for anything until now.” Stephanie smiled as the woman started flipping hangars on the other side of the rack.  “We’re going to the Kentucky Derby and I need a dress for that and for the Gala the night before.”  She looked around the shop, “I also need a hat.”

Jeanine’s eyes lit up, “ooh, we just got a couple fancy ones in our last shipment yesterday.  I’ll get them after we find you the perfect dress!”  She continued going through the rack then turned to a second one before yelling across the store to her associate, “Marcee, where’s the D&G that just came in the other day?” 

“D & G?”  Stephanie had no idea what the woman was talking about.

“Dolce & Gabbana, girl.  We got a fabulous floral sheath in the other day that would be stunning on you.  “Marcee, did you find it?”

The girl hollered back, “it’s behind the counter on hold for someone, but she hasn’t been in to pick it up.  That was like four days ago.”

Jeanine went behind the counter and found the dress.  “Four days?!  She snoozes, she loses.”  She hurried back and dragged Stephanie to a dressing room, “here” she pushed the dress at her along with a couple others.  “I’ll look for a gown too, get going on those.”

With a smart salute Stephanie turned to the dressing room, “yes ma’am!” 

She tried on several different floral print dresses and dismissed them all.  Nothing was quite what she had been looking for.  One was too white, one was too flowy and hung on her like a sack, one was just the total wrong color combination.  She hung the last one back on a hanger and reached for the Dolce & Gabbana.  

It was gorgeous.  As she unzipped it and took it off the hangar, she had a mantra of please let it fit running through her head.  She stepped into the black and floral silk sheath, it slid easily up over her hips.  So far, so good.  She got her arms through and with a contorted effort, reached back, said a quick prayer and zipped the dress.  She turned to the mirror, it fit like it was made just for her.  The sheath hugged her in all the right places.  The slight off-the-shoulder style showed off her toned and tanned arms.  And she was in love with the  purple floral pattern.

“Jeanine!”

The woman hustled over, the dresses she was carrying flying behind her, “what’s wrong?”

Stephanie stepped out and stood in front of the trio of mirrors, “Nothing, absolutely nothing. This is the most perfect dress!”

Jeanine looked her up and down, it fit the woman like a dream.  “I knew it!  I knew it was for you.  Now, let’s see,” she thought for a minute, “I’m sure I have a hat and shoes to go with it and here,” she passed off three evening gowns, “try these.”

“I don’t really need shoes, but, it’s the Derby so I definitely need a hat.”  Stephanie took the dresses, and already hated that she’d have to take off the one she was wearing. 

“Pssssh, you always need shoes, girl.”  Jeanine left her and headed across the store. 

♪♪♪♪♪♪♪♪

Hanging the two dresses on the hook on the open closet door, Stephanie just stared at them.  She couldn’t believe she had spent that much money on the one, but Jesus, she couldn’t wait to wear it.  And the gown the Jeanine had picked out was beyond anything her imagination could have come up with.  God, she loved Jeanine.  She hoped the woman never closed her doors.  She would never find another shop like hers.

“Hey, Sweetheart.”

Stephanie turned at Richie’s voice.  “Hey yourself.  I didn’t know you were back.”  He had been at the studio when she had left that morning to go shopping.  “How did it go?”

He looked at the bags on their bed and to the dresses hanging on the closet door. “Not as well as your day did apparently.”  Things were coming along with the songs he and Ori were working on, but a multitude of interruptions that day made it hard to get anything of substance done.  “Did you buy the entire store today?”

“No” she chuckled.  She had walked out with the two dresses, a hat, two pairs of shoes, a couple of skirts and a jacket she couldn’t bear to leave behind.  She would swear her credit card actually screamed a little when she ran it through the reader.  But what fun was having money if you didn’t splurge once in a while?  “I may have left one or two things behind.”

Richie stepped in front of her as she moved toward the bed.  “Are we going to keep being at odds with each other over this?”  He hated the distance he felt growing between them.

“Did you talk to Jon, or any of the guys yet?”  Things were nearly back to normal between them.  As far as she knew he still hadn’t talked to Jon, but she couldn’t force him to do it and while it was a bit of a wedge between them, she couldn’t keep badgering him about it.  But things were still slightly stilted between them because of it. 

He didn’t much care for the disappointment in her eyes either.  “No, but I did send Jon an email.”

She shook her head and moved around him.  “That’s not talking to him, Rich.”

Shoving the bags out of the way, Richie sat down on the edge of the bed, grasping her wrist and tugging her gently to stand between his knees.  “I don’t like this” he waved his hand between them, “thing between us.”

“I don’t either” she sighed and twisted around to sit next to him.  “I just don’t understand why you can’t make a phone call.” 

He brought her hand to his lips, grazing the back of it.  “It’s not that easy, Sweetheart.”

She studied him for a long moment and found something in his eyes she hadn’t seen there before. “What exactly are you afraid of?”

Chapter 19

This hiss of the air pump and the repeated thwack of the nail gun kept her focused.  She’d been replaying their conversation in her head all week.  How could he walk away from the only “job” he had known for the last 30 years and not say anything to those who mattered most?  He still hadn’t answered that particular question. 

Hiss.  Thwack.

She shook her head and re-aligned, she had to keep her mind on what she was doing or risk nailing her hand to the framing she was working on.  When the last nail was in place she set the nail gun aside and stood, letting the team raise the wall she had framed in. 

It was rewarding, fulfilling work; building houses for other people.  Putting a roof over someone’s head who was putting in as many hours, often times more, to make their dream a reality in the only way that was possible at that moment.  Stephanie grabbed the bottle of water from her tool box and took a long drink. 

Was Richie that unfulfilled, that unrewarded at his “job” that he felt he had to walk away without mentioning it to anyone?  Or was there some other underlying reason? 

There hadn’t been any anger when he told her what he’d done.  She thought back.  No, he seemed excited about the prospect of trying something new, something different.  She could sympathize.  Hadn’t she herself been scared and excited about leaving her paying job behind to go totally outside her box and pick up a hammer and build houses?  Maybe he really did need to do something different, work with different people, just like he had said.  But still, he had to talk to the guys.  He couldn’t leave them hanging like this.  They needed to hear from him personally, not just in relayed message from their tour manager. 

That was where she was having her biggest issue with this whole life change he was embarking on.  You don’t just walk out, walk away from a lifetime of friendship and musicianship without a word to those you were closest to.  And you don’t do it in the middle of a world tour for crying out loud.  It was beyond rude.  It was disloyal and she couldn’t even begin to imagine how betrayed and hurt Jon, David and Tico must be feeling.  Or maybe that was just her projecting her touchy-feely, girly feelings onto the manly men from Bon Jovi.  She snickered. 

Okay she really needed to stop thinking about all that and concentrate on what she was doing.   She tossed her empty water bottle toward the recycle bin.  They’d talk more when she got home.

@@@@@@

“All right, darlin’.  See you next week.”  Richie ended the call.  Orianthi was coming back to town next week and they were going to finish up the songs they had started the last time she had been there.  And then maybe he could convince her to collaborate on an album instead of just a few one-offs.

A glance down at his notepad showed him his schedule would be keeping him hopping.  He had a song to write for a new movie coming out, he had been asked to appear at a couple of fundraisers, had been asked to play at the Kentucky Derby and Ava had a school function he needed to attend later in the week.  Good thing he hung up his tour shoes.  He’d missed enough of Ava’s life being on the road.  It was good to be home for these things instead of hearing about them second hand. 

He turned the phone over in his hand.  As good as it was to be home, he did kind of miss the comradery with the guys.  It was quiet in the house this morning.  Stephanie was off working on her Habitat project, Ava didn’t live here all the time and she was at school anyway and Lily was with Jenna at swimming lessons. 

He was totally alone.

He turned the phone over again, noticing the time.  He could still hear Steph in his head telling him he needed to talk to Jon at least about this decision he had made.  Not that the David, Tico and Hugh were any less important. But she was right when she said Jon was his best friend and he should give Jon the courtesy of a phone call.  At the very least.  The fact that she was right didn’t make the impending call any easier. 

They had been attached at the hip for so long, spent so much of their lives in each other’s pockets, he had to believe that Jon hadn’t been all that surprised to get the news from Paul.  He also had to believe that Jon wasn’t that pissed off at him.  Hell, he’d left a tour before.  Granted it was for a stint in rehab and he had come back from that, but still. 

He flipped the phone over once more.  So many variables to consider.  How had they really taken the news from Paul?  From the news bits on the television and the way his phone continued to blow up, not very well, no matter what he would like to believe.  But he could only blame himself for that. 

A long, breathy sigh resigned him to the fact that he had to do the right thing here and talk to Jon. 

Had he let too much time pass to smooth things over?  Jon would be up and around by now.  He could call, try to explain his reasoning for ditching in the middle of the tour.  Would it really matter now?  Stephanie thought it would.  They had gone over and around this one point a million times in the past week.  She never wavered from her stance.  Do the right thing here Rich.  It seemed to be her mantra lately.

Waking his phone, he opened his email.  Call him a coward, but a written note might possibly smooth the way toward a phone conversation with Jon.  He had seen the man’s temper in full force and effect.  He may deserve it, but he still didn’t have any desire to take it full on in the face if he could avoid it.  Maybe a personal note would diffuse the temper and soothe the beast a little.

His fingers moved quickly as he started to compose the note.  

It was worth a shot.

Chapter 18

Richie paced from one side of his office to the other. With his hands in his pockets, he stared blindly out the window. Am I really going to do this? After 30+ years, am I really going to walk away from them and start all over again?

He paced back to the far side of the room. You know it’s what you’ve wanted for a while now. Besides, it’s become one big, monotonous machine. You have little to no creativity, no room to grow anymore. You’ve topped out. Where else is there to go if you stay?

He sighed and paced back to the windows. You basically have no say in much of anything. You’ll never be your own boss if you stay. You’ll always have someone making your decisions for you. You’ll always be at someone else’s beck and call.

He turned to move back and saw his baby girl standing in the doorway, the purple, sparkly band of mickey ears perched haphazardly on her head, several books in her arms. He had to smile. She loved her stories. “Hey baby girl, what are you doing in here?’

She grinned, flashing her dimples at him as she marched across the room to him, “read me” she insisted.

He scooped her up, “where’s your mama?” he asked as he settled them on the sofa.

“Store.” She handed him one of the books, “this one, pease?’

Digging his glasses out of his shirt pocket he glanced at the cover. Sofia the First: Holiday in Enchancia. He practically knew this one by heart. “Santa” had brought it and it had been a favorite ever since. He got through that one, Beauty and the Beast and was halfway through Cinderella when she slumped against him. He glanced down to find her asleep, her head resting heavily against his chest. He closed the book and eased her up to his shoulder before standing and heading out to put her in her bed.

Easing the band of ears from her head, he laid her gently on her bed and tugged up a light blanket. Giving her a kiss he backed out of the room, watching her for a moment before partially closing the door.

How many more of these moments do you want to miss. She’ll be a teenager like Ava before you know it. And Ava will be graduating and going off to college by the time you’re done with this go round. How much more of their lives are you willing to miss?

He turned and headed down the hall, more determined now. He didn’t want to miss any more of his daughters’ lives. He’d done enough. It was time. He reached into his pocket and swore. His phone was in his office.

♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪ ♪

Stephanie pulled her Camaro into the garage, surprised she hadn’t heard from Richie while she had been out. She was later than planned and hoped she hadn’t missed him. Not that he would leave without saying goodbye, but time had gotten away from her. She pulled her phone out and, nope, no missed calls or texts. Weird she thought as pushed open the door from the garage. Laughter greeted her as she moved past the laundry room and closer to the kitchen.

She had expected to find him, bags packed and ready to go, only waiting on her to say goodbye. She was surprised to see him sprawled with Lily on the floor of the living room just beyond the kitchen, pink and purple Legos spread out all around them, and the two of them laughing like loons.

She paused at the edge of the room, surveying the wreckage. “What did I miss, what’s so funny?”

They looked up at her simultaneously, matching grins and dimples on their faces. “Daddy stormed castle and boomed it up.”

She looked at Richie, the question clear on her face. “Boomed it up?”

He pushed at the blocks to clear a space and, with a not-so-quiet groan, climbed to his feet.  “There was a raid on the castle, chaos ensued and well, there may have been an explosion or two. It was close, but there was no loss of life.”  He glanced over his shoulder and one of the Lego people was in a couple of pieces. “One of them lost a limb, but he should have been more careful.”

She could only shake her head in amusement. Her husband was as much of a child as her three-year old at times. “And is there an excavation crew coming to clean up the mess?”

Richie grinned and crouched back down, “come on Lily, let’s get the bucket and clear away the debris.”

“What’s ‘bris, daddy?” She dumped a couple of blocks in the bucket.

He held up a handful, “the blocks, baby girl. Let’s clean up the mess.”

When all the blocks were back in the bucket Lily toddled off with them to her play room. Stephanie looked after her wistfully. She’d miss their joined laughter while he was away.

“Are you packed and ready to go?” A glance at the clock on the wall told her it was just about time for him to be heading to the airport.

He took her hand and led her down the hall to his office. “No” he told her as he closed the door.

“No?  What do you mean no?” Confusion was clear in her voice.

“I’m not going anywhere, Sweetheart.”

What was he talking about? “I don’t understand. You have a show tonight in Calgary, what do you mean you’re not going anywhere?”

He took her hand and tugged her toward the couch, “sit down, Sweetheart.”

She did and then she stood again as his words sank in, fearful she understood more than she really wanted to. “No, I don’t want to sit. And what do you mean you’re not going anywhere? What did you do?”

They stared at each other across the ottoman in front of the sofa. “I’m not going to Calgary or anywhere else for a while.  I'm done with the band.”

Her heart dropped to her stomach. “Done?”

He tucked his hands in his pockets, “that’s what I said, I’m done. It was time for me to step back and be here with you and the girls. I can’t be out there with the band anymore.”

“But…” Stephanie shook her head, still trying to grasp what he was saying. He was leaving Bon Jovi.

He. Was. Leaving. Bon Jovi.

Holy shit.

She looked at him, he wasn’t kidding. This was no joke. He was absolutely serious. “Why?”

“Because it’s time. Because I’m not excited about being out on the road and playing that music anymore. Because I want to see Lily go off to pre-school. Because I want to see Ava graduate high school. Because I want to sleep in the same bed with my wife every night. Because I have other music in me that I won’t get to make if I stay with the band.” There were a million other reasons, but he hoped she got the point.

She moved around the ottoman, coming to stand in front of him. “Are you sure about this?”

“I’ve been mulling it over since before we got married, Sweetheart. I’m ready to move on, move forward, make new music.” Not that he hated what he played night after night, but it got old and it was starting to feel stale.

She stared at him for a long moment, remembering all the times he had seemed introspective or lost in thought. Every time she had asked him if he wanted to talk and he said no. All the time he spent scribbling in the notebook she had grown to hate on their honeymoon. His excitement at meeting Orianthi and the songs they had been working on together. Had it all been leading to this? And why hadn’t he talked to her about it before making this life changing decision?

“Did meeting Orianthi have anything to do with this decision?”

His eyes widened, he hadn’t expected that. “She wasn’t the driving factor, but working with her lit a new fire in me to branch out and try new things.” He wasn’t going to deny the obvious.

“Is this what you were struggling with on our wedding night, and all those times you didn’t want to talk to me about whatever it was going on in your head on our honeymoon?”

She could read him so well at times, it was kind of scary. “Yeah. I was heading in this direction and wasn’t totally sure what I was going to do. That’s why I didn’t talk to you. I didn’t know what I was going to do at that point. Now I do. And I’m not making this decision lightly.”

No, she could see that. He had put more than a little thought into this decision. “Can I ask one more question?”

He reached out, took her hand, he needed that connection with her. “Ask as many as you want, Sweetheart.”

“How did Jon take the news?’ His best friend of more than 30 years could not have been happy with this decision, especially not with the tour still going forward.

He braced himself for the backlash. “I haven’t talked to Jon.”

“WHAT?!” She pulled her hand from his, turning away from him then whirling back, her hair flying around her. “How could you NOT talk to him about this?! How do you NOT talk to your boss, for all intents and purposes, about walking away from your job?!”

Richie stepped toward her and stopped when she took a step back, “he’s in show mode right now, in his routine. I called and talked to Paul. Besides, Jon’s not my boss.”

“Really?” She shook her head, he always forgot she was a fan. “I’ve been a fan as long as there has been a band, Rich. I’ve heard the stories, read the interviews. I know whose name is on the recording contract.”

He opened his mouth to deny, but closed it again. Dammit he kept forgetting she was a fan and she was right, he couldn’t deny it. “So.”

“So?!” She lifted her eyes to the ceiling searching for the patience she wasn’t feeling at the moment. Lowering them, she pressed her fingers to her temples to rub at the headache that was brewing. She closed her eyes and took a breath to calm down. She stepped closer to him and took his hand again.

“Even setting the whole boss thing aside for a minute, for the last 30 years you’ve been his right-hand man. He’s your best friend. They, Jon, David and Tico, hell even Huey, they’re the closest you have to brothers. How do you make a decision like this and NOT talk to them?”

Chapter 17

Checking the rearview mirror as she pulled around and parked in front of the garage confirmed her suspicion. Lily was dead asleep in her car seat. Stephanie smiled and eased herself out of the car. She was ready for an eight-hour nap herself. Disneyland wasn’t for wimps. She unbuckled Lily and lifted her from the seat, leaving the bags with their souvenirs for later. She made it to the door before the tired toddler lifted her head from mama’s shoulder. “Daddy?!”

“He’ll be home soon. He had to drop Ava and Shea off.” Stephanie rubbed her hand lightly, soothingly up and down her daughter’s back.

“’kay” Lily dropped her head back down on her mother’s shoulder.

They made it up the stairs and into Lily’s room before she stirred again. “Bed, mama.”

“Yes, my baby doll. It’s time for bed.” Stephanie gently took the sparkly band of purple mickey ears from her little head and stripped off the dress. “Let’s go potty first.” She took Lily into the bathroom and let her do her thing. While she was practically asleep sitting on the commode, Stephanie dampened a washcloth with warm water and ran it over Lily’s face and hands. “Good enough for now” she murmured as she lifted her exhausted little girl and carried her back to the bedroom. Tugging her nightgown on Stephanie tucked Lily into bed. “Sweet dreams, baby doll” she whispered with a kiss to her cheek. Leaving a nightlight on Stephanie closed the door and headed down to her own room.

Stripping out of her own clothes she unwound her braid and stepped into the shower. The hot water felt like glory on her tired, sweat-sticky body. Shampoo and soap left her feeling refreshed instead of ready to drop like a stone. After drying off she slicked on some lotion and pulled on a pair of cotton pants and a tank. Maybe she’d go down, pour a glass of wine, decompress from the day and figure out what was going on with Richie. She was finger combing her hair when she stepped from the bathroom and stopped.

Richie had made it home and was waiting for her on the balcony off their bedroom. There were candles lit and scattered around the bedroom and out on the balcony. He was reading her mind again. He had a glass of wine waiting for her on the new table. There was also a small box resting next to the glass. Pushing her hair over her shoulder, she crossed the room and stepped out to join him.

She picked up the wineglass by the delicate stem and sipped what she knew would be her favorite Riesling as she traced the embossed “Pandora” on the small box. As always, the wine was cool and crisp on her tongue. She knew what he was up to, but she played along. “What’s all this for?”

Richie’s lips curved into a knowing smirk, “it’s the ‘I’ve-been-acting-like-a-complete-ass-and-have-a-lot-to-make-up-for’ special.”

Caught in a triangle of candlelight, moonlight and shadows, it was hard to make out his expression, but there was no mistaking the amusement in his tone. She couldn’t help but smile. “Well, it’s a start.”

He reached out, his fingers stilling hers on the box and tugging her gently toward him. “How much more than ‘I’m sorry’ will it take to get me out of the doghouse?”

She took another sip of wine and set the glass on the little table in the corner near him. He had come to Disney after all and had given Lily, at least, his time and attention. That was all she had wanted. She didn’t care that his attention wasn’t centered on her, she wanted him to be there for his girls. He hadn’t given Ava as much, but he’d managed there too. All in all the day had ended up miles away from where it had started and the girls were happy. And, here and now, that was all that really mattered.

“You already said you were sorry.” She settled down into the chaise lounge that was next to the table, stretched out her legs, “and I told you I wasn’t mad anymore.”

He picked up the small box before moving to sit on the end of the chair. Putting the box in her hands, he lifted her feet onto his lap. “I know, Sweetheart, but I feel like we’re still at odds over what happened this morning.” He rubbed his fingers up and down her arch, digging in just enough to soothe and massage away the hours and miles she had walked.

Setting the box on the table with her glass, she closed her eyes and sighed. The man knew how to give a damn good foot rub. “You don’t play fair.”

“I just want you happy with me again.” He slid his fingers higher, caressed her ankle, her calf, “I don’t like having you mad at me.”

Her sigh turned to a moan when her pant leg slipped higher and his fingers found the sensitive spot at the back of her knee. “Not mad, irritated mostly.” And even the irritated was waning with every stroke of those very talented fingers.

He started on the other leg, “open your present” he continued the light caress on her calf. “I don’t like you irritated either.” But he had earned the irritation through no one’s fault but his own so he would do whatever it took to fix it.

Forgetting the box she closed her eyes. “Oh God.” She was going to be one big puddle of goo on the chair if he didn’t stop. “Rich, I’m never going to be able to walk back into the bedroom if you keep that up.”

He skimmed his fingers lightly down her leg and, with a little rearranging, moved up the chair to curl behind her, “who said anything about going inside, yet?”

She purred contentedly at the warmth that surrounded her as he settled closer to her. It had been a while since they’d had any intimate contact. She missed feeling close to him. She nestled more fully against him and his purr in her ear echoed her own.

His hand found its way up inside the tank she wore and long fingers lightly stroked the heavy under curve of her breast and up, to just barely tease the hardened tip. His breath was warm at her ear. “I’ve missed you, darlin’.” He carried the bulk of the blame for the distance between them and he was determined to put things to right with her.

With him wrapped around her, she could do little but press her bottom back against him even as she pushed her breast harder into his touch. “Missed you too.”

His hand slid down, pausing to lie flat against her stomach before slipping below the waist of her pants. “Hussy” he whispered finding nothing between her and the soft cotton. Her warmth drew him, a moth to the flame. His fingers brushed over her, urging her leg up and between his. He teased her with light, barely there strokes that had her hips undulating restlessly against him.

She pressed back against him, caught between the arm that was banded across her front and the hard, warm wall of him behind her, it was all she could do. She couldn’t ease the ache…if he would just…”god Rich, please” she begged, uncertain exactly what she was looking for but she needed something more, just a little bit more.

He shifted behind her, sliding his fingers deeper as he nipped along her shoulder and up her neck, his tongue both soothing and inciting. “Just let go, darlin’.” He bit down harder on her shoulder, rubbing away the sting with his tongue and she cried out as her whole body strained with release.

Limp with release and a long day’s exhaustion the only thing keeping her from rolling off the chair were Richie’s arms. His warmth radiated through her and had her curling as close as she could get without being inside his clothes with him. She purred her contentment and reached for him only to have her hand stilled. Prying her eyes open she raised her head slighty, “what about…?” She let the thought trail.

“That was just for you, Sweetheart.” He reached out a hand and snagged the box off the table. “Open your present.”

She shook her head to clear the post-orgasmic fog, “but you didn’t…”

He pressed a fingertip to her lips, “this isn’t about me.” His finger slid from her lips to under her chin and the slightest pressure had her lips in line with his. “Open your present, please.”

She kissed him lightly, “since you asked so nicely…” she picked up the box and unfolded the end and pulled out the tissue paper. The charm dropped into her hand and in the low light she could just make out the heart-shaped charm. Mickey and Minnie were silhouetted in the silver heart, nose to nose. She turned it over, the back was engraved with the words “Believe in Magic.”

Cradling the charm in one hand, she raised her eyes to his and cupped his cheek, “I believe every day, Rich. Ever since we met and you decided I was the one for you, I’ve believed.”

“Just don’t stop believing, Sweetheart. I know I screwed up, but just don’t give up on me, on us.”

“Never, but you need to use your head for more than just growing hair.”

He chuckled and held her close, “I get more than a little focused and tend to shut everything else out in that moment, but I’ll try, Sweetheart. I’ll try.”

Stephanie laid her head against his chest and started to drift. “I’ll miss you while you’re gone.” The tour was starting back up and he was leaving. Tomorrow.

He pressed his lips to her forehead, feeling her breathing start to even out. He closed his eyes. “I’m not going anywhere.”

Chapter 16

He approached Lily first, it seemed the safer bet to him.  He was fairly certain Stephanie wouldn’t make a scene in public but, erring on the side of caution, he started with the sure thing.

“Hey baby girl, look at you all sparkled up and ready to go!”  He crouched down in front of her and chucked her under the chin before pressing his lips to her forehead. 

“Daddy” she exclaimed and tugged on her mickey ears, “I gots ‘phia ears!”  Disney’s princiess-in-training, Sophia the First, was her latest obsession.

He smiled broadly, his dimples mirroring hers, “and they’re beautiful baby girl.”

He looked up at Stephanie and saw the softening of her expression, the irritation stated to fade from her eyes. 

“Hey.”

He rose from his crouch and held out his hand to her, a peace offering.  “Hey yourself Sweetheart.”

She slipped her hand into his, “what are you doing here?”

He tugged her closer, “can I just say you were right” he leaned down and his lips grazed her cheek, “and leave it at that for now?”

With his face shaded by his hat and his eyes obscured by his sunglasses, she couldn’t read him as well as she would have liked, but a smile danced around his lips.  She set her feelings aside, for the moment.  “You know we’ll be talking about it later, right?”

“Mama!”  Lily kicked the footrest of the stroller impatiently.

Stephanie shifted her attention to her daughter.  “Just a minute baby girl.”  She looked back at Richie, waiting.

He twined their fingers together and gave a gentle squeeze.  “I know.  But for now let’s just show the girls a good time and enjoy the day.”

She nodded, “okay.”

Lily continued to make her impatience known by angrily kicking the stroller footrest, and throwing her little body into rocking the stroller.  “Mama!  Daddy!  Let’s go!!”

Stephanie rolled her eyes and Richie crouched once more to soothe the savage beast he daughter was turning into.  “Lily, baby girl, look at me.”

She stopped her kicking and rock long enough to set her eyes on her father, “wanna go!”

“I know, but mama and I are talking.”

“No” her eyes welled and two fat crocodile tears slid down her little face, “no talking.  Wanna see princesses!” 

Richie rubbed her back, trying to calm her down, her tears ripping at him.  He hated when his girls cried.  “Okay baby girl, no more tears, okay?”

She sniffled and rubbed her eyes with the back of her hand, “’kay” her breath hitched and as fast as the tears started, they stopped.  “Go now” she turned her big brown eyes on him “please?”

He shook his head, god she killed him.   He stood and gripped the handle of the stroller, “where to first?”

They started the rest of the way up Main Street toward Sleeping Beauty’s Castle.  Fantasyland lie beyond the castle, so they’d start there and make their little girl a lot less cranky.

Ava and Shea broke from the party at the castle, heading toward Tomorrowland and Space Mountain, the Tomorrowland Speedway and whatever other trouble they could get into. 

“Meet us back at the castle, I’ll text you a time.”

Ava saluted her father, “sure thing papa bear” and took off with Shea.

Making their way through the crowd the little family headed toward the walk through of the castle and Lily spotted the Bibbidi Bobbidi Boutique.  “Princess!” she exclaimed. 

Stephanie looked at Richie, “maybe I should have made an appointment for a makeover for her?”

He perused the contents of the salon and the line of people waiting.  “Why don’t we just buy her a costume at one of the gift shops?  That’ll make her just as happy.”

“Yeah” she agreed.  “You’re probably right.”  She looked down at Lily, “how about we get you a dress after we ride the merry-go-round?”  Prince Charming’s Regal Carousel was about 20 feet in front of them.

“’Kay mama.”  She looked up and saw the ride, “horsey, mama!”

Stephanie smiled at Lily and then up at Richie, “you heard her, let’s go ride the horsey.”

They made their way around Fantasyland, managing to keep Lily happy with a new purple Sophia the First dress to match her ears, a storytelling experience at Enchanted Tales with Belle, a meeting with Ariel at Ariel’s Grotto, a meeting with several Disney Friends at Pete’s Silly Sideshow and a snack at The Friar’s Nook before standing in line at The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh. 

Richie rolled the stroller back and forth, doing his best to keep Lily from throwing a fit.  “You know we should take her over to Disney’s California Adventure Park.  That’s where Hollywood Land is and where the Frozen Sing-Along Celebration and the Disney Junior show is.”

The line inched forward, “let’s see how she does here before we make any more plans.”  The last thing she wanted to do was deal with an overtired, over-stimulated three-year old.  Lily was a happy, cheerful little girl, 98 percent of the time.  It was that other two percent you had to watch out for.  Don’t make her angry, you won’t like her when she’s angry wasn’t an understatement when it came to Lily.  She had a hell of a temper.  Hopefully on this attraction she could roll, bounce and float off some excess energy from being strapped in the stroller for so long.

Lily was laughing and sitting on Richie’s shoulders when they exited the attraction.  She patted his head, “Cups, daddy!!”  She had spotted the Mad Hatter’s Tea Party when they came out of the Winnie the Pooh Adventure. 

He looked at Steph, “what do you think, can she handle it?”

She looked at the ride, it seemed tame enough.  “Just don’t get the cup spinning out of control and she should be fine.  And hang on to her.”

He lifted Lily from his shoulders, “what, you think I’m taking her on that?”  Just the thought of spinning around in crazy circles made his stomach churn.  “Uh, you should probably take her.”

Stephanie laughed at the green tint that his cheeks had taken on, and took Lily’s hand “really, you can’t handle teacups?”

He grinned sheepishly and shook his head, “nope, rides that spin were never my thing.”  He patted her on the ass as he moved by her, “go have fun, I’ll be waiting over here” he pointed to the exit area where there just happened to be an empty bench to sit on. 

He stopped at the Cheshire Café and got a lemonade before settling on the bench to watch his girls.  Lily waved the first time they spun past him.  She looked slightly fearful on the next pass but by the time the ride stopped she was laughing and begging for more. 

They finished their tour through Fantasyland, wended their way through Tomorrowland to the Monsters Inc. Laugh Floor and finished back at the castle.  Richie shot off a text to Ava.  

At the Castle waiting.

Just getting on BTMR, be over when done.

“They’re getting on Thunder Mountain Railroad, then they’ll be over.”  Richie and Stephanie found a place to sit and wait.  Stephanie adjusted the stroller seat for Lily who had finally dozed off and she laid her head against Richie’s shoulder.  She should mad at him, but it was hard to keep it up.  Seeing him with Lily, their laughter and smiles, the absolute joy they got from one another trumped her anger.  “I’m not mad at you anymore” she murmured near his ear.   

He turned his head, pressed his lips to her forehead.  “Good.”

She angled her head up, her mouth a breath from his, “I’m glad you decided to join us today.”

He dropped his lips to hers.  “Me too.  It’s been a good day so far.”  And he made up his mind right then and there, with her pretty, mermaid-y eyes gazing into his that he wasn’t going to miss any more family days and moments if he could help it.

Chapter 15

Q Note:  I've never been to Disneyland so don't shoot me if I get the details wrong.  Thanks and enjoy!  :)

Richie set the guitar aside. He hadn’t been able to concentrate on anything other than Stephanie’s parting words to him that morning. He hadn’t wanted to admit it to her then, but she was right. He could have put this off. Should have put this off and gone with them.

He looked at the woman in the chair across from him. Her head was bent and her long, blonde hair draped over the body of the guitar as she played. She was an amazing guitar player. She made him want to be that much better than he already was. It was a continual learning process and he was going to get his master’s degree if it killed him. She chose that moment to pause and look up at him.

Her blue-gray eyes peered out at him from under a heavy fringe of bangs and he felt that thing again. There was something there that he just couldn’t ignore. His eyes slid from her face to the guitar in her lap, then lower. Her legs, bared by the simple shorts she wore were slim and smooth. 

I shouldn’t be thinking about her legs. 

What was he doing? He picked up his guitar again. Anything to get his mind back on the music and off of her.

“Are you all right, then?” He’d been fussy ever since she had arrived at his house that morning.

He set the guitar aside again. “Can’t get my head in the game today.” It was useless to think he’d get anything accomplished with the argument with Stephanie weighing on him and the thoughts he definitely should not be having about Ori circling around his brain.

“Do you want to talk about it?” If he couldn’t concentrate there was really no point in her wasting her time. “Or should we call it a day then?”

Richie stood, paced to the windows and turned. The sun was haloed around her and her eyes were full of smiles. Yeah, he needed her to go before he did something insanely stupid. “It’s just something I need to fix. Can we get together another time? When are you back out here again?”

She opened the calendar app on her phone, “I can rearrange a couple things.” She packed up her guitar and grabbed her purse. “Call me next week?”

He led her out of the room and down the hall toward the door. “That’d be great, and thanks.”

“Sure thing.” She turned and kissed his cheek. “Good luck and all.”

He shut the door behind her, leaned against it and blew out a breath. It was time to get his head out of his ass. He was married to a fabulous woman, had two beautiful, precious daughters. No way was he going to throw that away for a woman half is age just because she looked like an angel and could play the guitar like a demon.

He headed toward the other side of the house, pulling out his phone on the way. He shot off a text to Ava as he was backing out of the garage.

YYYYYY

“No mama, no ‘troller!” Lily whined.

Stephanie scooped her up, “sorry baby doll but yes, stroller. Do you see how many people there are?”

From the safety of her mother’s arms Lily looked around. “Lots.”

“That’s right, lots.” Stephanie slid a slightly calmer toddler into the seat. “I don’t want to lose you, so you get to ride today.” She crouched down in front of her daughter, “unless you want to push mama around?” That got her the giggle she was hoping for.

“You too big mama.” She pushed her face away after getting covered with kisses. “Let’s go!”

“Okay girls,” she looked over at Ava and her friend Shea, “are you going to stay with us or go off on your own?”

“We’ll stick a bit” Ava decided. “And then we’ll see what’s what.”

“Good enough.”

They headed down Main Street USA along with the rest of the crowd.

Stephanie took Lily into the Emporium while Ava and Shea hit the Starbucks in Market Square. Ava had just placed her order when her phone vibrated in her pocket. It was a text from her father.

Where are you?

Starbucks…Market Square Papa Bear. Why?  Steph had told her that her father was working today and couldn't come with them so why did it matter where they were?

The barista called her name, her order was up. Her phone vibrated once more.

Be there in 10-15. Don’t tell Steph.

She furrowed her brow, okay that was weird. Why not?

The shuttle Richie was on slowed to a stop at the main entrance gate.

Trying to fix a prob. C U soon. 

He pulled his ball cap lower and adjusted his sunglasses and waited for everyone to depart the bus before making his way down the aisle. The line to get through the security check was long, but he moved to the far left side and, carrying nothing but his wallet and phone in his pocket, was able to get through the crowd with little fuss.

He moved up Main Street, his long smooth stride eating up the distance as he bypassed the Fire Department, Disneyana, the Gibson Girl Ice Cream Parlor (a particular favorite). He got to Starbucks in time to see Ava and Shea head into the Emporium. Dodging a small crowd he moved on to the Emporium and scanned the store. He was never going to find them. He walked through, keeping an eye out for his girls. It took a few minutes, but he finally caught up to Ava.

 “Hey Baby Girl.”

Ava smiled and threw her arms around his waist. “Papa Bear, you made it!”

He returned the hug and pressed a kiss to her head. “Yeah, sorry I didn’t start the day with you though.”

She laid her head against his chest, “s’okay, you’re here now.”

He rubbed her back, “where’s Steph and Lily?” He had a lot of crow to eat with Steph and he wanted to get it over with.

“Last I saw she was over in the kiddie section.”

Richie untangled himself from her, “I’m going to find her, you guys wait by the exit for us when you’re done, okay?”

She saluted him, “aye aye, papa bear.”

“Smart ass” he laughed as he walked away.

He made his way toward the section for his littlest princess. He scanned the room full of ruffles and bows, glitter and sparkle. He didn’t see them anywhere. He wandered through and back toward the front of the store. He finally saw them as they were heading out to where he told Ava to wait. Easing through the throng of people crowded near the cash registers he stepped out into the sunshine at nearly the same time Stephanie pushed the stroller through a door a bit further down the sidewalk.

He couldn’t help but smile at the picture they made. Lily turned and looked up at her mother, purple sparkly princess ears perched on her small head and her dimples radiated joy as she grinned at her mother. He shook his head at his own stupidity. Had he really thought to miss this? He should kick his own ass.

He had taken no more than a couple steps when Lily noticed him. “Daddy!”

Stephanie hadn’t seen him yet and she leaned down to her daughter, “he’s not here baby doll, remember?”

Lily was adamant, and pointed her little fingers in Richie’s direction. “No mama, daddy!”

Stephanie followed her daughter’s fingers, sure she had seen someone that resembled Richie. Surprise and confusion warred for purchase on her face as she straightened and watched Richie stride toward them.

Chapter 14

The sun streamed through the doors that led to the balcony off their bedroom and across the bed.  She stretched, searching for the warm body of her husband.  She found only smooth, cold sheets instead.  Frowning, Stephanie opened her eyes and pushed the heavy fall of hair away from her face.  His side of the bed was empty.  The smoothness of the sheets telling her he hadn’t made it to their bed last night.  She sighed.  They had been home for a week and this was the third time he hadn’t come up to bed.  Ever since he had gotten that fateful call from Alice Cooper when they were in Hawaii and he had met Orianthi, he had been nonstop with the writing and composing.

Pushing back the covers she headed toward the bathroom.  She could still see the delightful surprise on his face when he realized the woman that played guitar for Alice was the same woman he had been so enamored with at Bloody Mary’s in Bora Bora.  What were the odds of that?  He had gotten up on stage that night with her and Alice and had a grand time playing.  There had been an instant connection with the woman that was inescapable. 

She shook her head as she stood in the shower, still wondering what the hell kind of bitch Karma was to have that woman thrown into their lives yet again.  She just hoped he knew what he was doing.  He was supposed to be getting ready to leave again tomorrow to continue the tour with Bon Jovi.  He hadn’t even packed for that yet and today they had planned to take Ava and Lily to Disneyland.  Shutting the water off, she grabbed a towel, she dried off and braided her hair back from her face.  She hoped he had gotten some sleep. 

Pulling on denim cut offs and a t-shirt, she opened the bedroom door and found Lily reaching for the outer handle.  “Good morning baby doll.”

She beamed up at her mother, “morning mama.  Princess today!”

Stephanie picked the toddler up and dotted her face with kisses, “that’s right.  We’re going to see the princesses today.”  Her daughter could care less about Mickey Mouse, but she was bound and determined to find every princess in the park today.

“Ava too!”

“That’s right, baby doll” she agreed as she stepped into a room fit for a princess.  The pink walls of Lily’s room were adorned with clings and cut outs of every princess in the Disney collection.  The small, white toddler bed was covered with a pink and white spread and Disney princess sheets.  And she had every Disney book, animal and doll known to man.  Thanks to her father who couldn’t seem to remember the word “no” when it came to his girls.

“Come on baby doll, let’s get you dressed.”  She set Lily on her feet and went to the white dresser against the wall.  “What do you want to wear today?”

“’Phia, mama.”

From the top drawer she pulled out the purple Sophie the First panties.  In the next drawer down she found the purple t-shirt and shorts that would complete the ensemble.  “Sophia it is my lady.”

Lily giggled and stripped out of her nightie.  “Hurry mama.”

Stephanie helped her get dressed and got her hair into pigtails.  “Okay baby doll, let’s go have some breakfast and see if we can find daddy.”

Lily raced out of the room ahead of her mother, “daddy!” 

Stephanie followed Lily and slowed her down at the stairs, “be careful and hold the railing.”

“I am mama.”

Stephanie got Lily settled in the kitchen with a bowl of cereal and a glass of juice.  “You stay here with Jenna.  I’ll be right back.”

“Kay mama.”

Stephanie pressed a kiss to her daughter’s head and, leaving her in the nanny’s very capable hands, went in search of Richie.  She found him in his music room, passed out on the sofa, his guitar precariously perched on his lap.  She carefully eased it from his grip and set it in the case that was open on the floor.  She closed the notebook that was on the ottoman by his feet and gave him a not-so-gentle nudge.

“Rich.”

He shifted against the leather cushions, snorted out a yawn and rubbed his hand over his face before settling down to sleep again.

Stephanie opened the drapes and the sun streamed in, hitting him full in the face.  “Rich” she tried again a bit louder this time.

He blinked and opened his eyes, closing them immediately against the brightness of the sun.  “What the fuck?”

She moved into his field of view, “Rich, wake up.”

He ran a hand over his face again, “what time is it?”  He didn’t remember falling asleep.

Moving to block a bit of the sun she leaned down and pressed a kiss to his forehead.  “It’s time to get up.”

He tugged her down next to him, “you’re awful cheerful this morning.”

“I’m trying to get in the mood.  We are going to the Happiest Place on Earth today.”

He was quiet for a minute.  “About that, Sweetheart…” he trailed off, a little afraid of her reaction to what he was about to tell her.

She turned to face him, recognizing the tone of his voice.  “Oh no, no way Rich.”  Her rising anger added a flush to her cheeks.  “You’re not doing this, not today.”

“You don’t understand Sweetheart.  Ori is only in LA for a couple days and she’s coming here today to finish up the song we’ve been working on.  She only has today.”

Ori?  Now it’s Ori?

Stephanie stood, paced away from the couch and back again.  “This trip has been planned since we got back from our honeymoon, Rich.  Lily is having her breakfast and excitedly telling Jenna all about which princess she wants to meet first.  Ava is on her way over.”  She narrowed her eyes at him, “are you going to tell them that we’re not going because you decided work was more important?”

Richie frowned, “that’s not fair Sweetheart.  You know I wouldn’t let them down if it could be helped.”

“From where I’m standing it can be helped.”

Frustration had him raising his voice, “I told you her schedule was tight, Sweetheart.  What do you want me to say?”

“What about your schedule, Rich?  I thought family time was sacred.  You told me you wanted to spend more time with the girls.  You’re leaving to go back out on tour and won’t be home for weeks.  That’s why we planned this trip today.  Now you do this?  I don’t get it.”

He ran a hand through his hair, “I’ve told you before you never know when inspiration will hit.  We, Ori and I, found a connection, there’s something big there I think and we need to pursue it.  We need to see where it’s going to go.”

“That part I get.  I do,” she continued when he frowned.”  What I don’t get is how you can be so callous with your daughters’ feelings.”

He opened his mouth to say something and she held up her hand, “no, just don’t.  I really don’t want to argue about this anymore.  I’ll take the girls to Disney while you write your opus with Orianthi.”  She crossed the room and opened the door, “I really hope it’s worth it.”

Stephanie several deep, cleansing breaths and pasted a smile on her face before walking back into the kitchen.  Lily had finished her breakfast and was talking animatedly with Ava. 

“So, who’s ready to go to Disneyland?”